It is somehow the loveliest, most beautiful, raw thing of looking back on your path and being able to see that the deviations you used might have been shortcuts. I have been across the table of many successful women CEOs, founders, executives, and changemakers and nearly all of the talks, the same thought comes out in the conversation; I just wished I knew this earlier. These aren’t regrets, really. They are the lessons earned due to wading through unknown waters, in most cases without a guide.
The thing which leaves me most impressed about these talks is that even though they are universal, they are also very personal. The lessons are quite similar, no matter whether you are working your way up the corporate ladder, creating your own empire, or opening up a whole new road altogether. And the best part? They do not have anything to do with working harder or being perfect. They are working smarter, treating yourself better, and realizing that leadership is not about possessing all the answers it is about posing more effective questions.
The Permission You Don’t Need to Wait For
Among the strongest disclosures that have been made by successful women is this; they wasted years of their lives waiting to be given permission which they never even needed in the first place. We sit and hope that somebody will inform us that we are prepared to get that promotion, that we are totally fit to take up that opportunity, or that we are prepared to be at the table. However, here is the reality approval is a myth that continues keeping the bright women in holding bays.
The women that are featured in magazines such as Influential Women Magazine did not sit back and wait to be given the keys. They built their own doors. What they should have understood earlier was that confidence does not come before an action, but as a result of it. You do not have to be completely prepared to make the jump. As a matter of fact, everyone will kick-start confidence by doing something when they still feel unsure, and seeing themselves up to the task.
I recall an interview with a tech executive who said that she had said no to three years of speaking engagement because she did not feel an expert. This was when she eventually said yes because she knew that the audience did not want perfection but instead appreciate her side of the argument. That changed of mind opened doors where she did not even know its presence.
Your Network Is Your Net Worth
There is nothing the successful women everywhere wish they had done more before and one of those things is to establish authentic relationships. It is not transactional networking in which you amass business cards as a sort of treasure trove but rather the true networking based on reciprocal support and sincerity. Women who have had the greatest influence did not act as individuals but rather formed networks of supporters, teachers and advocates who trusted in them even more than they believed themselves.
Social networking websites such as influential women magazine have become invaluable spaces where such connections can be made and communities established where women can share insights, wins, and wades through problems. However, the magic does not lie merely in having a network but being truly interested in the success of other people. My most successful female acquaintances are fanatical when it comes to opening doors to other people, introducing people, and promoting talent wherever it exists.
What they would have realized sooner is that there is nothing more wise than requesting assistance. Your network would be your safety net when the times are tough and your launchpad when you are growing. It requires conscious effort and attention, it must be cultivated, nourished and observed to develop, not only changes in your career, but your leadership in general.
How to be a perfectionist is a cage, not a crown
This is the unpleasant fact: perfectionism as high standards has been the greatest retardant of women ever. We take our time to make each email shine, we practice until we could pronounce a presentation and we fret over making choices that do not warrant such scrutiny. In the meantime, our male counterparts are delivering substandard work and revising during the process.
Successful women would like to know that they should have realized earlier that doing something is better than doing it perfectly. It is true that, B+ work that is submitted on time will often perform better than A+ work that is submitted late. The appearance with its imperfection, which is real, is more of a trust than any artificial front could create. Busting stereotypes refers to not playing by old fashion rule which requires women to be impeccable in order to be taken seriously.
One of the founders whom I interviewed informed me that during the first five years of her business, she revisited the same pitch deck rather than making a pitch. Once she settled on good enough, she ended up with three investors within two months. The lesson? Standards are very well, but the progress is better.
The Time Is Your Best Currency
Successful women whom I have known best have finally acquired what has eluded them over years: mastering time. Not time management mastery. There’s a difference. Management is a matter of putting more on your time-table. Mastery is of defending what matters and ruthlessly destroying what does not.
The thing they would have preferably known earlier is that saying no is a full sentence. Boundaries, they are not selfish; boundaries are necessary. You can not pour out of nothing you have to do, though everybody needs you to do it. The women who have continued to be successful over time did it not by being all things to all people but by being smart in how they allocated their energies.
This involves rejecting the chances, which do not match with what you want regardless of how enticing they are. It involves outsourcing functions that other people have the capability of performing 80 percent as well as you can. It involves setting rest appointments as you would a meeting since burnout is not a trophy you show off to everyone but rather an indicator that you were deaf to the signals that your body was sending you.
you have made it to own your story. You can begin to rewrite it today, to make a choice in favor of power rather than powerlessness, possibility instead of restriction.
Your True Voice Is your SuperPower
And lastly, the best advice that successful women have provided their younger selves is this; do not keep trying to be like the other person in leadership. The stress to fit within traditional models of leadership, which are predominantly made by men is the reason why many of the good women are forced to restrain their natural abilities. They also hope that they could have felt earlier that they are not as weak, as indecisive, and want to communicate in a certain way.
The leaders who are the most impactful in the present day are those who presented themselves entirely and they bring their entire being to the table. They ceased to code-switch, ceased to shrink, ceased to apologize about not being able to take up space. They got to know that being authentic is not only fulfilling on a personal level, but it is also strategic. Authenticity builds trust, which is why people adhere to leaders whom they have trust.
Moving Forward
It is a beautiful thing to learn something through those who have walked the road ahead of us because we are able to avoid some of the detrimental stray paths. You do not need to ask permission, hone yourself to the point of paralysis or lay your wellbeing on the altar of ambition. You can develop your own definition of success and create leadership on your conditions and not on the conditions of who you believe you should be.
The successful women who are telling these lessons are not telling that the ride will become easy. They are saying that it makes more sense. You get to know what is important and what is not important and how to discriminate the difference. The only way to change is to create resilience not by not falling into failure but by learning how to stand up quicker every time you fall. You find out that your best asset is not knowing all the answers it is having the courage to ask the questions that are important.
Whatever leadership level you may be at, bear in mind that the wisdom you are searching has been inside you. The lessons that you will teach someone who is in need of hearing will be influenced by the experiences that you are going through at this moment. Believe in your path, believe in your words, and believe you are where you are meant to be.
